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McPerky

We donned our swimming costumes and stepped onto the pool deck to see our aquasize instructor limping around with a mop in hand. “What happened to you?” we asked.
“I have a groin injury, ” he grimaced. “My supervisor will be leading the class tonight.”
Our shoulders uniformly slumped as we realized how much we would miss our good natured, rolly-polly teacher.
Then we saw her.
She came bounding out of the staff room wearing a shiney one-piece speedo bathing suit and athletic aqua socks.
She was ripped.
She was fit.
And she was PERKY.
She introduced herself but I don’t even remember her name, since I was blinded by the gleaming smile she had plastered on her face. The class began and she led from the side of the pool, fiercely hopping around, kicking, squatting, punching. We tried to follow her, but she was going so fast! Five minutes into the class we were already out of breath and Jen whispered, with fear in her eyes, “Is this just the warm up?”
Next we moved onto the deep water portion of the work out. Normally we wear floaty belts or take our buoyant dumbells to keep our heads above water.
But not this week.
We were instructed to grab a pool noodle, string it between our crotch and clench it in place.
Neat.
So there we were, the tips of our noodles poking out in front and behind us. (Jen’s was the longest noodle and she was quite proud. I had a case of noodle envy as I got stuck with the stumpiest one there. Oh, the shame.)
The novelty of the noodles wore off quickly and we all grew tired of our teacher’s squinty-eyed, smile-till-it-hurts approach, so eventually we just kind of floated listlessly and moved around just enough to make it look like we were trying to keep up.
Somehow we survived the hour. The bad news came as we were exiting the pool. “So, I’ll be leading next week’s class too, until Shawn heals! See you then!”
Mercy.

10 Comments

  • That’s funny. I had a spinning instructor like that, but it’s a lot harder to disguise exhaustion on a stationary bike than in a pool.

    You could always just tell her you need a lower impact workout for the baby. Must be nice to have a built-in excuse:)

  • It was quite the AquaFit class. I think I may have burned more calories laughing than actually working out.

    And any calories I did burn got resued when I swung through the McDonalds drive thru on the way home to get a Strawberry Triple Thick Milkshake.

    And those pool noodles … I’ll have to e-mail you about that because I don’t think it’s appropriate for your blog.

    ;)

  • That’s very funny. I go to a class at Curves with an instructor like that. She’s very energetic. Lot’s of fun too.

  • That is hysterical, I would love to see my aqua class be given noodles! :)

  • Maybe it’s a GOOD thing I didn’t join :)

  • I didn’t like it. I didn’t like shiny, mega-smile, tight bums, and I didn’t like the noodle. My crotch is chafed.

  • It sounds like at least this one wont sarcastically offer you the microphone!

    It sounds like you still had fun with it all (except for the crotch chaffing part…Poor Christy)

  • I love this story! I have no idea what I’m going to do when you stop aquasizing. I’ll have to do something drastic like exercise myself, eghads!

  • I once had a step-class instructor named Barbie. Oh, the perkiness!

  • Very cute comment, about the “noodle-envy”.

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