I have my second prenatal appointment this afternoon. I am just past 10 weeks and they will try to hear the baby’s hearbeat today, although I am told not to be alarmed if it can’t be detected since it’s still quite early. I really want to hear it, though. Somtimes this pregnancy thing still feels kind of like a big game of make-believe, since I can’t see or feel the baby yet. I guess the sore boobs, scalp shedding, extra sleepiness, and emotional sensitivity will have to suffice as symptoms that convince me that there’s actually a baby in my belly.
My appointment is at 3:00, so I have had to create a urination strategy. Every time I have a meeting with the OB/GYN I have to pee in a cup, and I am not good at peeing under pressure. I was the kid who, on long road trips, would force my parents to pull over at every seedy gas station in rural Saskatchewan, but then when I’d sit down on the pot, I wouldn’t be able to pee. Even though my bladder was full, I could not make myself pee. It made me cry and I thought something was wrong with me. Normal kids could pee on demand.
At my last prenatal appointment I made sure not to pee all morning, and then when they asked for a “sample”, I filled the cup up to the brim and the nurse looked at me like I was a weirdo and she was afraid that my pee was going to overflow out of the cup onto her gloved hand.
However, I digress.
Today at 3:00 I will have to pee in a cup, so I’ve been making sure to drink lots of water and not let myself take my usual eight afternoon trips to the ladies room. As with most things, when you are trying not to think about something, it becomes all you can think about.
“Don’t think about peeing, Amanda. You can’t pee until 3:00” says the rational voice in my head.
“Pee. Pee. Pee. Must pee. Can’t wait. It must be unhealthy to hold one’s urine for this long. Your teeth are floating. Pee,” says the obsessive child in my mind.
“Just focus on doing some work. Get your mind off of your bladder,” counters rationality ( I don’t think that’s a word).
“Bladder. Bladder is full. Must empty bladder. But if I empty my bladder now, I won’t be able to go at the doctor’s office and they’ll tell me I’m a bad girl who can’t pee. Why can’t I pee on demand?! This is bringing back traumatic childhood memories of stooping over an outhouse in Southey, Saskatchewan. Help me.”
I’m fighting a losing battle.
4 Comments
Don’t mean to gross you out, but… my doctor used to let me bring the sample to the office. I used to have to ‘plan the pee’ too, but if you can get over carrying your own urine around in your purse, it’s not so bad! ;)
Just wait to you have to have an ultrasound!
ug! the full bladder before the ultrasound. Hopefully they don’t think your bladder’s TOO full. Then they give you a cup & say, can you just empty a cup full & come back? You have to pee & then STOP!
I had a terrible experience when I had to “drink up” to fill my bladder for the ultrasound! Man, it was a joyous adventure, that’s for sure.
I hope that it went well…
~ELizabeth
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