This photo is of Steve’s brother, Trevor, and his foxy new wife, Laurell on their wedding day. Along with the grumpy, uncooperative niece they would probably like to Photoshop out of this picture. Oh, good times!

*Photo by the amazingly talented Jamie Delaine.

Right now I am sitting in a private villa overlooking the Pacific Ocean. We are in San Diego and are having a marvelous time. We spent the entire day at Sea World and Avelyn was amazed by all the creatures we saw. We have never really done the “family vacation” thing before but it’s going pretty well. An ornery three year-old can be a bit challenging to lug around even the most idyllic of destinations but we’re finding the fun in between the meltdowns and bad attitudes.

Tomorrow we’re off to the Zoo. And for now, I’m off to lounge on the bed while Steve and Avelyn are out for a dip in the pool.

*We left Karenna at home with her Nana. Judge not, lest ye be judged!

Spring is here and I am in love with: the warmth of the sunshine, afternoons at the park watching the girls play while I sip on a mocha, the way the light streams in through the windows in the mornings and coaxes me out from under the covers, play-dates with friends where kids dig in a sandbox and actually behave like civilized little humans for a while, Cadbury Mini Eggs, laps around the yard on tricycles, clean floors (short-lived though they may be), girls’ nights in, kettle corn, extra pulpy orange juice, and early bed times.

Winter is such a dreary season and it always amazes me just how much my mood improves and my heart awakens (pardon the CHEESE) come the spring. Our kids are about 675% happier when they’re playing outdoors so I’ve been shipping us all into the sunshine for big parts of every day and we’re all better for it.

The house is coming along grandly and we should be moved back in in a couple month’s time. Here are some photos of the progress:

Here’s Steve and the girls in what will be our new dining room, with covered deck off to the right.

And aren’t you pleased with the landscaping? The kids have seriously never been happier playing in the yard with all the random planks of lumber, rusty nails and a lavender bathtub. We might just leave it like this.

And the tired, dusty man who’s been working non-stop to make it all happen. Go, Steve!!

There are now paint colours up on most of the walls and the flooring starts to go in this week! Wahoo!

Let’s celebrate with some Cheerios in classy plastic bowls!

PS: My latest post is up at urbanmoms.ca and it’s about parenting styles and philosophies. I’d love for you to chime in with your thoughts.

We walked up the steps to our friends’ Christmas party and I clutched his arm as I wobbled in my heels. He was in a tux, I was in a fancy dress and my wool coat. I stopped for a moment and pondered that somewhere along the line we had become grown-ups together. Weird. When you are married at 15* you get to grow up together, and seven years and two kids later, we have.

The Christmas party was great. The food was tasty, the friends were abundant, and the laughs were unstoppable.

*Fine, we were 19. But STILL.

Last week Steve and I got to talking about how we both feel as though we’ve been on auto-pilot for much of the past year: when he comes home from work, he plunks his lean rear on the couch and zones out in front of the news for a couple hours while I have my face buried in the laptop as I try to make dinner and the children are at their worst as the witching hour(s) approaches. We are all in the same room, but not really connecting. Yes, we’re tired: Steve works so hard and always has a dozen projects on the go; I am exhausted from the needs of two very challenging and demanding little girls. So we’ve kind of justified this zoned-out behaviour by saying “these years are extra hard, so we just have to get through them, and then it will be better” and allowing ourselves those things that give us a break in the day that we feel we need.

However…

We both agreed that this isn’t really the life we envisioned for our family, and that while it’s easy to rationalize the tv/computer escapes, we know that we’ve developed some habits that could be hard to break a few years from now and we don’t want to miss out on the moments we’re in.

So, we’ve made some changes. Nothing rigid or strict, we’ve just been more conscious of our choices and have been making an effort to turn off the television, shut down the laptop, and connect as a family. And it’s been amazing. I have also been implementing some of the philosophies found in Connected Parenting and we have been blown away by the positive changes we’ve seen in Avelyn. I cannot say enough about this book, and I think that everyone would benefit from reading it, especially those with particularly challenging children.

With the computer closed and the tv off, I’ve been busy with real life and even though there are still moments of frustration and exhaustion in my parenting experience, they aren’t defeating me like they used to.

We’ve been hosting play dates, decorating sugar cookies, perfecting puzzles, having friends over for dinner, reading books, and colouring.

We still have a long ways to go, but it feels so good to be a little closer to the life we had hoped for.

My friend Kristin (who I have known since the fourth grade when she had a brushed-out perm and I was a chubster) is here visiting this week with her husband, Martin, and the times, they have been good. We’ve been canning peaches (my first solo run and can you believe the lids all sealed? Hooray for dodging the Botulism Bullet!) and playing at the park with the kids and eating ice cream (with Peanut Butter m&ms on top) and lazing at the beach. We hadn’t seen each other in over a year so this has been her first time meeting Karenna.

They have been doing some serious bonding and are both smitten with one another.

Seeing your friends love your kids is pretty great.

Avelyn is running a fever again and woke up barfing in the night (getting sick while company is here is quickly becoming one of her favourite past times). So let’s remember her in better moments, shall we?

Nothing like an ice cream feast with Daddy.

I hope your final days of summer have been as sweet as ours.

Yesterday a big delivery truck pulled into our driveway and brought a shiny white box to my door. It was my new Macbook Pro!  Yes, you read that right.  Steve finally relented, but only because I found a smokin’ deal on ebay.  I got it for about half the price it would have cost me to buy it from the Apple store and it came with the 3 year applecare warranty as well as Adobe CS4.  So I am set! And loving it!  Thanks to everyone who chimed in with positive reviews about their macs.  In the end, Steve disregarded your words and was swayed only by the cheap(er) price I was able to track down.  

I’ve got some cute pictures to post of what we’ve been up to lately but all this sunshine has been making me lazy. (Wait. I’ve always been lazy, but am extra so now, I suppose.)

Thank you so much for your outpourings of support and prayers and “I’ve been there, my kid was a total beast when he was two too”s. I hesitate to mention it, but Avelyn has been mildy happier this week and I am not pulling my hair out in chunks anymore. Kids, they take you for quite the ride, don’t they?

My current pc is dying, sputtering its final breaths and I am on the market for a new computer. It’s no secret that I am dreaming of a Mac laptop, but Steve will have none of it.  He’s convinced you’re paying for nothing more than the brand name, since you can get get an identical computer (as far as RAM and processing speed goes) for one third the price.  I am convinced that he’s a party pooper.  He needs firm, solid evidence that a Mac is worth the money.  Anyone care to give it? I need all the help I can get here.  Also, I take donations.

Last night we had some friends over for dinner and they brought their two children.  When I look at their eldest daughter, I see Avelyn’s future.  In talking with her mom, Sarah was exactly the same temperment as our girl: she had a lot of frustration, pent-up agression, tantrums and grumpiness.

But as she got older, she blossomed into a sweet girl who is kind and smart and sweet. The old adage “it gets better” might not be the urban legend I thought it was.

Perhaps, someday, it will get better.  Until then, I’ll take the good with the bad and try my best not to go bat-crap crazy.

I roused early Sunday morning to see Steve sitting on the bedside holding a card.  “Happy Mother’s Day, Amanda! Read your card!” he prompted.

I blinked the chunks of sleep from my eyes and focused on his writing in the card.  It said, “I got you a Mac computer. Go and check the dining room table.”

My old pc has been slowly dying and I have been begging Steve for a Mac for the past few months.  It’s not in our budget at this point but I thought, “Wow! He pulled out all the stops and got me that MacBook Pro I’ve been drooling over.  What a great guy!!”

I walked into the living room and yes, it was true! There as a Mac sitting on the table, all booted up and purring like a kitten.

A kitten from 1991. Who is missing her back leg.  And has no fur because she chewed it all of due to an anxiety disorder.

There she be!

There’s a floppy drive and everything! Now all my technological dreams can come true!

Under the monitor was a little wad of cash from Steve that he has instructed can only be used as a deposit for when we actually do get a new computer.  He makes me laugh (while simultaneously dashing my hopes).

We had a nice Mother’s Day: brunch on a sunny patio at the winery down the street, a stroll to the ice cream parlour, a movie in the evening and an early bedtime. Avelyn was off-the-charts grumpy all day long and Jolie only napped for 45 minutes so the little creatures that actually made me a mother were kind of driving me crazy, but that’s what being a mom is all about, right?

Double trouble, those two.